Introverts are thoughtful, imaginative, tend to work independently and think outside the box. Introverts are keen observers and sensitive listeners. Introverts prefer to be involved intimately with one person and are often drawn to life’s spiritual side. Introverts are not antisocial, shy, or aloof.

But they are in the minority—outnumbered by extroverts three-to-one in a culture that values being an “Outie” over an “Innie”. And they are easily misunderstood, as often by themselves as by their extroverted families and loved ones. Here to change all that is The Introvert Advantage, How to Thrive in an Extrovert World, which combines Dr. Laney’s clinical experience, interviews with Introverts, research from neuroscience and related disciplines to piece together the physiological reasons why introverts and extroverts behave differently. This book helps introverts to understand, appreciate and manage their internal processing systems.

Dr. Marti Laney, an introvert herself who works as a therapist specializing in introverted clients, knows all the trouble spots and how to cope with them. There are the advantages and challenges of each kind of relationship: female Innie and male Outie, male Innie and female Outie, and both male and female Innies. Dating strategies, with one key bit of advice for that anxiety-producing first meeting: “Don’t try to be extroverted!”How to determine if your child is an introvert, and how to understand—and work around—his or her special needs, especially how to do so if you yourself are an extrovert. Seven guerilla socializing tactics, including the four phrases of small talk and fail-safe ways to get a break to cope with that “too-much” feeling.

Then there’s the subject of work, with a full chapter devoted to introversion at the office: how to let co-workers know you are participating at meetings, how to blow your own horn without feeling overexposed, plus bridging Innie/Outie communication gaps, four ways to ask for what you want, de-stressing your day, and a five-step plan to reduce overwhelm.

Shakespeare, of course, said “To thine own self be true”. For the introvert, finally, here’s how.